The Storm Before the Calm

Thoughts & Reflections

The only aspect of life that is linear is the passing of time.

Apart from that, true, deep, daily learning, development, progress is a bit more, shall we say, tumultuous?

For adults and for children alike, it’s one step forward, two steps back, three steps sideways, oh look a beautiful flower, a massive jump ahead, up the ladder and back down the shoots, an unknown amount of time with seemingly little progress (if any), and then one day, what do you mean “learning,” I’ve always done this.

It’s busy and still. It’s effort and waiting. It’s trust and is anything happening and hand holding and encouragement.

All learning. Learning to code, learning how to use a new coffee maker, learning how to run after an injury, learning how to walk, learning to feed yourself, learning division. Moving at our own pace, from a place of mastery and strength is ideal and helps set us up for success, but it’s still not always one day follows the next, incremental improvement each day.

Young children are learning so much, and it’s such Big Learning. Learning to feed yourself. Learning to walk. Learning to talk. Learning to read. Toileting, dressing, having a discussion with a friend rather than a meltdown.

We’ve noticed a trend. Before any big learning, really big amazing life-changing feat, there’s a storm. A storm before the calm.

You know what you’re not yet capable of. You’re acutely aware of your own limits. You know what you could do yesterday and you’re so discouraged you can’t do that today. No wonder emotions are close to the surface.

This is exactly where we need to be. This is where we keep company, we encourage and support, we allow time and space and sit on our hands except for those times when hand-holding or a hug is required. We’re in their corner — they come in for a bit of comfort or coaching or space to breathe, before going back into the ring with those shoelaces, those letters, that spoon that just won’t make it’s way from the bowl to their mouth.

This is the storm.

And then, much like a real storm, all of a sudden it’s over. Those words tumble out as though there was no struggle in forming them. Of course I used the toilet all by myself, what else would I do? Yes, I’m reading, is that surprising?

So we march on, ready for the next storm, and the calm that will inevitably follow.